Monday, July 18, 2005

hesitation

Well, I guess I have a girlfriend.

We've been going on a couple dates a week and talking on the phone daily. I didn't necessarily want to push it into an exclusive dating relationship, but that's what she seems to want and I haven't argued against the idea. She's nice, she's fun to be around, she likes me a lot, she treats me very well, she's fairly cultured, educated, cooks well (and likes to do it), and does other things well (and likes to do that...)

It's fun to have a girlfriend, and it's nice to be dating again after so long... but I'm not really getting the feeling that she's "the one." Still, I don't really want to end what we have at this point. So I'm unsure whether I should tell her everything I feel right now. She also wants us to sleep together. We've done everything but that, but for some reason I don't think I'd feel right doing it. I guess it's because I don't see the relationship as being a permanent thing. So I guess what it comes down to is I'm unsure of what of this to tell her. I'd still like to continue dating; and I guess this could become a very long term thing... but something inside of me is telling me to hold back.

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