Tuesday, August 24, 2004

better living through chemistry

I have no motivation or inspiration to "blog" tonight, but I'm doing so to keep in practice.

There's nothing new with me; I've been working a lot, reading a little, and not much else... my mental state has been a bit volatile; it seems to happen around this time of year for some reason. I'm functional and sane for the most part, but when I get stuck up in my head for too long, sometimes my thoughts start to get a little...


It's not as bad as last year, and I think a lot of it can be attributable to a little pill I take daily -- one that may have saved my life. As screwy as I am and as bad as I feel sometimes, it's nothing close to the way I was then. Simply being conscious was painful, and my brain was scrambled so badly that formulating and spitting out a complete sentence sometimes required a herculean effort. I really don't know what caused it. I've never really fit neatly into one category of mental disorder, if any at all. All I know is that a few weeks after taking this little white pill, things, relatively speaking, have been going great. I have no life, I have a lot to atone for, but I'm young yet, and I think if I can keep my head screwed on just a little bit, then maybe I'll get to do some neat things over the next 50, 75, years on this mortal coil.


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